Getting Set Up
So, lets be honest, we’ve all tried it. And why not! It’s the 21st century and these days it’s unlikely that you’re going to bump into your beau at a jive, sadly it’s not 1950. And unless you’re willing to openly prowl coffee shops it might be one of your only opportunities to get to know your possible other half while they’re sober. In this post I’m gonna discuss those first steps and then explore the things that can go right and wrong once you’re up and running.
Online dating, like dating in all medias, can be tricky. With numerous websites waving offers in your face every time you turn the TV on or go on social media, just picking a site can be hard! In many ways I would sway you from doing what I did:
Now I can’t complain about how this worked out for me too much, because through those three little words (and numerous changes to profiles etc) I met my boyfriend, who I love and hope to stay with. But I did have some mishaps, mostly centred around horny men (not tarring all men with this bad brush, this is just my experience) asking me if I “like big cocks” or telling me “you have amazing tits”. Now this could be that I just attracted that particular bunch or it could be that my dating site was a greasy spoon compared to the michelin starred Match.com, but either way I found some diamonds, mainly my guy.
So if I don’t recommend my “fuck it” attitude, what do I recommend? Well:
-Know yourself: This is vital! Online dating only works if you know what you want and I honestly believe that. If you want casual dates, put it on there. Gender doesn’t matter. Fine, if you say “casual sex” you might attract unwanted attention or get some dodgy messages but it’s better than wanting that and stating “long term relationship” and not being happy with the results. If you’re unsure say so! Be in the market for new friends and a short term solution with the possibility of it becoming more. However, knowing yourself is more than this, especially today. With sexual orientation, religion, occupation, even political views taking a place on the center stage of the dating scene, assessing the importance of these areas to yourself is more important than ever! And all are catered for! If you know you, you can take the next step.
– Research: If you set your heart on doing it the modern way and using online dating sites, look into them all. If is saying Zoosk 9.9% of it’s couples are going on to get married, find the evidence. Or better yet, talk to a friend! Chances are they’re on a site too or have been in the past and they will provide honest advice on what to expect and whether it’s worth joining.
-Patience: So you find a site you’re happy with and are immediately hit with the wrong type of person, what do you do? NOTHING. Seriously, resist the urge to click the disable button and just wait. You’re new. Fresh meat. You will get all the wrong attention for a bit, but amongst those idiots could be the one for you. So give it a chance, read the messages, wait it out. You might actually be surprised by the person you enjoy talking to the most.
In my opinion, this simple system works. You wouldn’t rush into buying a car so why rush into finding a dating site?
Hope you enjoyed!
Next; Profiles! Dun , dun, dunnnn